Prayers That Keep It Real for Diddy

Writing Scenario: I wrote this for Diddy back in 1993. I had a friend who said Fonzworth Bentley was her cousin. I printed an entire Prayers That Keep It Real book for Diddy and wrapped it because it was his birthday. She was supposed to see Fonzworth Bentley and he was supposed to give the book of prayers to Diddy. Needless to say, I am not sure if he did or not. So, once again, this is one of the prayer's in the book I wrote for him and maybe one day I'll get to give it to him.

P.E.A.C.E.

God, I just want to have a fireside chat with you. Man, sometimes my mind is so cluttered and noisy that I can't even think straight. Everyday it is always something. I have to be everything to everybody  and sometimes that gets lonely. Things and people are always there to test you.

Because of the business you have me in I get hurt by so many people. And because I am who I am, I have to keep stepping and act like everything is cool. But deep down in  my heart that stuff hurts because I'm still human. I cry like everybody else and hurt like everybody else. I know that I look like I have everything under control in my life, but I got issues too.

I guess what I am getting at is that I need you to teach me how to go through things and not be crippled by them. Keep my emotions in line cause you know a brotha can go off at times. Sometimes I want to be the victim for a little while to show people that they really hurt me. But you know I am too cool to stay at that place too long. So, I dust myself off and get back up again.

All, I am saying is this, I face so many challenges every day. I face the challenge of not wanting to get up some mornings because I just don't feel like it! I have the thoughts of what would life be like if my Father, Biggie and Mase were still in my life? Because it's a lonely world out there and when you lose the three people that you cared about the most, it makes it even lonelier sometimes. So, help a brotha find PEACe in the midst of discouragement. 

Help me to change my attitude in the midst of pain and disappointments. Help me not to be too prideful to cry and just talk it out when I need to. Put people in my life that I can trust to share my heart with in those moments. I know that I throw the cards in my life but you determine how they fall. 

One thing I know for sure is that you are always consistent in my life. You have a track record with me. I have seen you bless me even when I don't deserve it! Help me to always have PEACE even when I can't see my way out!

I just hope that one day you can use the pressures of my life to help somebody else. 

COPYWRITTEN 2003

Here is another poem that I wrote from Diddy's perspective to God. I am giving you two that I wrote for him because he was actually the first celebrity that I ever wrote PTKIR for. Check this one out.

IF I SHOULD DIE TONIGHT

Father,

If I should die tonight

I want to know that my work is done

I don't want to be caught off guard

And then it's too late

If I should die tonight

I don't want to be partying and having a good time

Thinking that my good deeds are going to get me brownie points with you

And then I get played

If I should die tonight

I want to know that I didn't go to sleep mad

Assuming I was gone wake up and move on

And then I fall asleep and never get up

If I should die tonight

I want to know that I will have an eternal home with you

BEcause I have been living right with you

And it has nothing to do with the fact that I say "I love you," but everything to 

do with the fact that I know you

If I should die tonight

I want to know that my sons will carry on what I started

Because I was a good role model to them

And they will be men of substance and integrity

If I should die tonight

I want to be known for being a man who took risks

A man who took life seriously

And yet always put a smile on your face

If I should die tonight

I would want to make sure that i was living right with you all along

And I didn't have to say a quick prayer during my last breaths

To make sure I make it into heaven with you.

If I should die tonight

I want to know on that great day when you come back

That I will be in the number

And you will be able to look at me and say I'm proud of you.

Son, you finished strong!

COPYWRITTEN 2003