Prayers That Keep It Real: For Brittany Spears

Writing Scenario: I wrote this prayer for Brittany as she was in the thick of the media. When she first lost custody of her children. A lot of times the celebrity can become obsessed with the attention from the Paparazzi's and in return it appears as if the Paparazzi's become obsessed with the MONEY that celebrity picture can get them. It's all greed for them. But, in return the celebrity ends up suffering the most because it breaks them down.  Even though I wrote this poem for Brittany maybe you know someone that this poem can touch. Maybe you have felt like you wanted to call it quits and give up on life. Maybe you have gotten caught up in being popular but you are really empty or unsure of yourself on the inside. If you know someone like this or this is you. I hope you dig this prayer.

From Brittany’s Eyes

Death has clutched me. I can’t see where I am going. I have made a connection with the devil. He is feeding me thoughts of suicide. My life is bankrupt. I am a burden to myself. I don’t even like me. I constantly day dream of dying and I have become one with those thoughts. I have accepted that I am trash and I have messed my life over.

 

My heart is moaning with pain. The pain gets so loud that it brings out my maniac. It makes me lose myself. It burdens me and my eyes become limp with tears. My mind is constantly in agony. My soul is cluttered and in distress. I am in a dark place. I have given demons permission to torture me. I am warped for good. I took it too far. I didn’t know how to stop it. And now I sit in a lonely place in my psyche. I wrestle with the devil everyday. So, far he is winning.

 

I am in my own cult. I have shut my family and friends out because truth has made me drowsy. I want to do it my way, damn it! Drinking, drugs, sex, it all gives me a temporary satisfaction. It gives me the illusion of happiness. But, when I wake up from it all, I still have a bond with the devil and he has turned me out. No one understands me. So, I isolate myself hoping for one glimpse of light. Hoping to find the core of my handicap. I want the few people around me to get me out of this hole. But they are lost in my world. They need someone to pull them out.

 

The media has been my adversary. It has made me an ass in front of the entire world. It laughs at me and it wants the next best story. If they don’t back off of me, I am going to do it. I am going to end this once and for all. That will be a great story for them to write and a nice six-figure check in their pockets. I am the next Anna Nicole. She slipped away and I am kissing the same demons she did. I can smell her, she is near, some one catch me!

 

If there is a God, I summons you. I am a basket case. My life has crashed right before my eyes and I am too weak and sick to pick up the pieces. You have brought me to rock bottom. You can’t possibly care about me. The world is scrutinizing me and I am under their microscope. I can’t defend myself because I am lost. If you are all of that then answer my mothers prayers that she has prayed for me. Pray for me because I am not pure. I am bruised. My heart is bleeding and the pain is stern. Am I going to ever come to or am I going to expire myself?  Do something because I can’t!

COPYWRITTEN 2007